Life In The Fast Aisle

Today I did the marketing. That sounds so much more sophisticated, almost European, than buying groceries. In the interest of full disclosure, this isn't my first time do this. After all I was a single dad for ten years and did all the marketing. Now that I'm retired I wanted to do something to ease Shellie's work load. So the house is very neat and the yard almost enviable. And now, after a long hiatus, I'm back in the food store, Wal-Mart none the less. With list in hand I set out this morning to do battle with the hungry hoards. I traveled up and down the rows all the way from the pet department, health and hygiene, paper goods, canned goods, dairy, produce, and finally frozen food. I was pleased to find that there are less sideways, aisle-blocking carts at that time of the morning and few screaming children. For once I couldn't complain about the slow bewildered looking elderly because I was clearly numbered among them. The only drawback was the long line that awaited at the check-out. Apparently we all finished our shopping at exactly the same moment. But after numerous announcements of "code 7 to the front" several lines opened and the crowd thinned considerably. In my attempt to further my "slowness" philosophy, I chose to remain in the same line. Then on to the car with bags safely tucked into the trunk. I felt very successful, even accomplished. I was able to procure almost everything on my list. How those ice cream bars found their way into my cart is still a mystery.